I really love my job. I am at a different place than I was two years ago. I loved being home full-time with my girls, but now that they are getting older, I feel like I am exactly where I am supposed to be at the this point in my life by teaching these precious first graders.
This week, however, has been a very challenging week. I have a very rambunctious class this year. I love them to death, but I REALLY have to keep my thumb on them. We also have to stick to a strict routine. They can get overexcited when we get off routine, and therefore it turns into behavior problems.
Well, I went in to school Monday, and found out that we have a college group from Iowa visiting on a mission trip. They were assigned to help out in our school and help with the after school tutoring program. I think it is WONDERFUL what they are doing, but I was kind of relieved that we were not going to have to have one in our classroom because it would completely throw off my kids. Tuesday afternoon, we were going about with class and our regular routine, and this girl from the group popped in and said she would be in the room helping out. It completely threw ME off-guard because I wasn't expecting her and my assistant was out of the room at the time. I had to stop what I was doing to find something for her to do. The minute she walked in, our rules and routine were both COMPLETELY thrown off. I didn't have a chance to talk to my kids about what was going on beforehand, so they were wanting to get up and down to talk to her. She started out by talking to them and winding them up, and it almost turned in to chaos. I was very disappointed with their behavior while she was in there.
I thought Tuesday was going to be the only day she would be in my room. However, it turned out that she has been in all week, and will be there tomorrow. I have to be out tomorrow, so I am kind of concerned about how everything will go. My assistant will be there, though, so that will be a plus. I don't want to sound whiney, but it's just been really hard, and we have had more behavior problems this week than we have had any other week of the year.
It's just been a really bad week. Then today happened.....
I cannot and will not go into details, but I had my eyes opened to what some of my students have to go through. One of them happened with a little boy in my class and some things he goes through with his home life.
Another happened will a little girl. I do not want to go into details, but she has a disability, and I had a meeting with her parents today, and it was just really hard. I gave her a spelling test with them there, and it broke my heart to see them try to help her and get her tissue when she got upset....and it just showed how much they love her and want what is best for her. My eyes have tears as I am typing this. There is more to it than that (nothing MAJOR).....just some things that I had talk to them about as far as her progress. As I said, it was just a really hard meeting.
This is a long post, but this week has opened my eyes to the fact that God has me in this classroom for a reason. He has placed each student in my room for a reason. My job is to love them unconditionally and let the light of God shine through me. Yes, we have hard days. Yes, we have frustrating days. I just hope that God shows through me and that each and every child in my class knows that I love them very much and I want the very best for them. I think it shows most days, but as I said, some days (or weeks ) are just hard. Also, he placed these college students in my room for a reason. I will admit that I had a ROTTEN attitude about it until yesterday when I realized again that God put them with us for a reason. I have tried to give my college girl the best experience possible, and I hope she has seen the hospitality that Mississippi is know for shown through me.
All in all, my prayer is that God's light will shine through me no matter what situation I am faced with in my day to day life.
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